Please Don't Feel Sorry For Us!

Did you know it's impossible to feel sorry for yourself and be thankful at the same time? In other words, when I am tempted to crawl under the covers and cry about the fact that Valerie is not able to be like other kids, I cannot, at that same moment, be grateful I have her as my daughter.

It came to me today, yet again, that there are so many opportunities to be thankful in the midst of plenty more occasions to be discouraged. The mental battle began when I started fixing dinner, or, more accurately, when I'm tried to decide what to fix for dinner. There's always a tiny part of me that wishes we could just eat Normal Food.

Normal Food is cheaper. Normal Food often tastes better. Normal Food is easier and faster to cook.

A good friend recently commented after I served him a strange combination of ingredients (and then apologized for it because I would like to serve him Normal Food just one time), "But what is normal food? That could be different for everybody."  That was a good reminder.  Why am I always afraid to be seen as strange or different? Why does it bother me that our special foods cannot be bought at the cheaper grocery stores, but have to be hunted down in obscure backwoods shops or ordered online?

If you are like me, you are used to people saying, "Oh, no! Your child can't eat that? HOW do you cope?"  or even worse, "What CAN she eat?!?"  I don't get offended, but it do get tired of explaining, "There are a lot of things she can have, but not much that most people call convenience foods!"

Maybe you are just starting out on the food allergy journey, and you're feeling helpless. Please know that I have been there, roaming the aisles of grocery stores, reading labels til I cannot see straight, only to realize that I should just make it myself.

I have found there are some people who are so emotionally attached to their cheese and their wheat bread that they almost have a heart attack when I tell them calmly that we just find other things to eat. It's very meaningful, then, when a friend who not only understands that one must read the labels, offers to cook or bake something for us, and then goes over the ingredients with me one more time before we serve it.

With Valerie, I have often had to firmly (but kindly!) remind people that they must not feel sorry for her that she cannot eat the cake or the cookies or the fun food that is dangerous for her. She is used to eating other things, and needs to be praised for taking good care of herself. She doesn't need their pity; she needs people who will help her be thankful.

Here are the positives we have to be grateful for with Valerie:

• We are grateful that she is alive and well. 
• We are grateful that her body reacts by vomiting up a dangerous substance, instead of keeping it in the system and shutting down her airways.  
• We are grateful that she understands why she must not eat certain things, because she is now old enough to understand and articulate how she feels.

We are also grateful that there is more to life than food.

If I focus all my meal making efforts on whether Valerie will enjoy or hate the food I serve or react to it or thrive on it, I miss the whole point of loving my little girl. Loving her means appreciating her for who she is and how she was wonderfully made by her Creator. It means reminding her that while she does not have to like everything I give her, she has the opportunity to choose to be thankful for it.

Because at the end of the day, it's just food. And at the end of the day, we are spoiled rotten that we get so much of it.

Relaxing Art

Val created these with Art Set App, her reward for finishing her Math book! (please excuse the side view of the one above, I couldn't figure out how to rotate it!)

Egg Replacers

Here are two choices for baking that work well for us whenever we want to substitute for eggs.

 
Chia seeds and milled linseeds (or ground flax seeds for Americans).

For one egg, mix 1 Tablespoon chia seeds or flaxseeds with 2 Tablespoons of warm water and let it sit for a few minutes. Flaxseeds work well in cakes, cookies and muffins, and I have used chia seeds to add extra protein to our pancakes. Chia seeds get a bit gummy, so they do not work well in bread. 

Best and Easiest Chocolate Cake-- Egg Free, Wheat Free, Nut Free, Dairy Free, Delicious!

This recipe is adapted from Moosewood Restaurant Cooks at Home, copyright 1994 "Six Minute Chocolate Cake"

We made this for Jimmy's 4th Birthday, and instead of keeping the cake in the pan, I used parchment paper so it would slip out easily, cut it into some blocks, and used the frosting on select bits of it to stick the blocks together and then stuck his Angry Birds Star Wars figures on top! He was thrilled. (and so were his siblings)


1 1/2 cups plain flour (I used Dove's Farm Gluten Free, and added 1 tsp Xanthan gum)

1/3 cups Cadbury's cocoa powder

1 teaspoon Bicarbonate (we call this baking soda)

1/2 teaspoon sea salt

1 cup Sugar

Sift all the above ingredients into cake pan (square 8 inch or round 9inch)

In a 2 cup measuring cup, mix 1/2 cup sunflower oil, 1 cup cold water

2 teaspoons Vanilla extract together

Pour liquid ingredients into pan with dry ingredients and mix with small whisk

When batter is no longer lumpy, add

2 Tablespoons apple cider vinegar

Stir just til vinegar is evenly distributed

Bake for 25 to 30 min.

Set aside to cool




I found a recipe for chocolate coconut cream icing
http://ohsheglows.com/2013/05/20/2-ingredient-chocolate-fudge-frosting/

Energy Snack!

Here are some ideas for energy snacks: roasted and lightly salted sunflower seeds, sunflower butter, dates, coconut, coconut oil, pumpkin seeds, gluten free oats, chia seeds.

I have been known to throw some handfuls of coconut, chia seeds, sunflower seeds, gf oats, sunflower seed butter and dates into the food processor. Chug it round til it becomes the consistency to shape into balls and eat!

A little bit about me and some about Valerie

Last post I shared with you where I found myself ten years ago due to extreme food and environmental allergies. My situation felt very hopeless until I was introduced to Reliv. Do not fear readers, I will not be posting about Reliv often, but it is an essential component of my journey back to health, so you will hear about it from time to time, and how our family benefits from it.

I was able to get pregnant the first month we tried, and had a wonderfully healthy pregnancy. I even had great bloodwork after a mandatory c-section for our first daughter Valerie's birth. She was breech, and this meant that from day one, we knew things were going to be a bit different for her.

At three months, Valerie began breaking out in hives during feedings. I was breastfeeding exclusively, so I was perplexed. I had heard that if your child is breastfed, she should not have allergies.

Valerie proved this theory to be incorrect!

At seven months old, she had her first anaphylactic reaction to dairy and had to be hospitalized. They used strong steroids on her, and her skin, which by this point had broken out in eczema all over, cleared up beautifully that week. As soon as the steroid course finished, though, her skin erupted into worse lesions than she had had before.

We took her to a chiropractor and a cranial sacral therapist. I was trying elimination diets, keeping food diaries, and giving her all kinds of different solid foods that seemed to pass straight through her.

By the end of the year we were sent to a gastrointerologist, after the pediatric allergist and the dermatologist had exhausted their ideas and prescriptions. He diagnosed her with an inability to digest protein, and severely atopic. She was losing weight, and having diarrhea every day.

We were given a prescription for Neocate, which cost about $300 a month. We took her off the Reliv completely, (by this point I had weaned her) and we saw her become lethargic, her nose began running constantly, and she got constipated.

After a month of this, in desperation, I put some Reliv into her bottle with the Neocate. We saw the runny nose go away in two days, her energy and happiness came back, she began to poop again (!), and her skin gradually began to clear. Over the next months, we were able to slowly introduce solid food again, starting with rice, and vegetables, some fruits, and then gradually wean her off the Neocate once she had gained back enough weight.

We are are so thankful that she did not suffer any developmental delays, as we knew this was a possibility. By the time she was 2 1/2 her skin was completely clear.

Over the next years, we saw her grow into a child who is faced every day with challenges, but has overcome so much.

Asthma is something she deals with, but on a very low level. Her symptomatic inhaler is needed every time she
gets a cold, but only using the bare minimum of the medicine to breathe easier.

Although she is still very allergic to wheat, dairy, eggs, beef, lamb and all nuts, Each year she seems to get a
bit stronger and a little less sensitive. And her skin is clear! Doctors say she will probably never grow out of these allergies, but we
have hope that she will as her immune system continues to strengthen.

Reliv is a part of her daily routine as well as the emergency drink when she has a reaction to some hidden
ingredient. The reaction goes away within twenty minutes after having a shake.

Valerie was the first of our four children. We are a gluten free house, and have seen that help all of us with various complaints. The children are all dairy intolerant, although my husband consumes dairy products, and I eat dairy occasionally.

Why blog now? Because I know what it is like to be scrolling through pages and pages of websites, asking, "am I the ONLY one who deals with a child with allergies to so many things?" or "What can we have for dinner that we can ALL eat?"

When Valerie was 4 years old, she was outside in her Grandma's garden singing to herself and loving the sunshine and flowers. She came running up to me and said, "Mama, my life is true!" And so it is.

My hope in writing this blog is that, in your hardest moments, you can realize that there is always hope, and a reason to look up and be thankful for the flowers.

Millet Surprise!

This recipe is adapted from Gwyneth Paltrow's Brown Rice and Kale from her cookbook, My Father's Daughter.

So Millet.... most people think it's birdseed, but I have found it 

                works very similar to Quinoa,  has same protein content, and costs a fraction of the price. 

Cook it like rice (about twice the water to the seed) Add some salt. 

In a separate pan, stir fry a bunch of chopped spring onions, 

chopped red pepper, and 3-4 cloves garlic. 

 Add finely chopped (use your food processor), washed Kale--no stems-- 

Stir fry til nice and bright green, and a bit tender 

Mix into cooked millet with some sprinklings of Aminos to taste. (Liquid Aminos are a wonderful alternative to soy sauce, for those on a wheat free diet.)

Black Beans and Rice

My kids LOVE this meal. So cheap and still yummy. 

Soak the beans overnight, well covered with water, with a teaspoon of Apple Cider Vinegar (this breaks down some of the enzymes in the beans)

 Drain and rinse. 

Pour in fresh water and bring to boil.

 Simmer or put in Crock pot on high for at least 4-6 hours. (til they're good and soft) 

The children like the beans with salt and Pure Sunflower Margarine. 

My husband and I like them seasoned-- saute onions, garlic in olive oil or coconut oil til translucent. Add in a few teaspoons of your fave curry powder and cumin. Fry up til it smells amazing, but be careful not to burn it! 

Add in a can of diced tomatoes, stir and simmer, with as many beans as you need for 2-4 people. Pour over Rice.

 (if you do not have a rice cooker, consider getting one! Lifesaver for folks who eat rice several nights a week.)

Where it all started

It feels like a daunting task to chronicle what we have been through over the past ten years, but it's time. I have finally come to a place where I am not pregnant, or nursing, or trying to get over being pregnant or nursing! My story began in earnest ten years ago. I was a senior in college and I was tired, stressed out, and feeling like food and environmental allergies would be an ID badge I’d wear for the rest of my life. Sometimes I felt like introducing myself as, "Hi, I'm food allergy. I'm very tired, so don't try and tell me your name, as I probably won't remember it." At one point in college, I was found to be allergic to 15 different things. Needless to say, eating at the dining commons was next to impossible. Chronic fatigue, brain fog, fuzzy head, difficulty sleeping, and dependence on an air purifier defined my days. I was extremely sensitive to chemicals, perfume, the outdoors, the indoors-- and even people--and thought I always would be! I married in 2001, and my husband was fully aware of my situation and loved me anyway. One day I told him that I did not want to meet one more person-- it took too much effort just to get through each day, let alone demonstrate interest in anyone else. I did not think I would be able to have children, or at least if I did, I would have to be on bedrest throughout pregnancy because I was almost too tired to function. I used to go to Whole Foods or any other health shop and ask them what supplements I should try. I took garlic, tried mushrooms, special juices, protein drinks, herbs, homeopathic remedies, vitamins, minerals, and even bitters. When I heard about a nutrition supplement called Reliv, I tried it only because of the money back guarantee. Absorbable nutrition was something I knew I needed and within three months, I saw marked improvements in my digestive tract, my immune system, my allergies, and especially my energy. By 6 months, I could eat all 15 foods that I had previously gotten migraine headaches and hives from. I am a different person today, and love meeting new people, and can often even remember their names! Next post, I’ll share with you the rest of my story and provide the next installment of this saga that began when our first daughter Valerie was born.